Levi and Shep are having a quiet afternoon in, no searching for demons or being chased by demons or trying to establish dominance over demons. This is a strictly demon-free afternoon, at least from Shep’s perspective. It’s pretty hard for Levi to be demon-free, but at least it’s a chance for him to sit down and not think about dying.
Gordon Ramsay shouts from the TV, but Levi isn’t paying attention. He’s watching Shep, who isn’t knitting like he usually does, but is on his phone, swiping left every several seconds.
“What are you doing?”
“Nothing.” Shep swipes left on his phone again. And again. He stares at the screen for a bit, then swipes left.
“Tinder?”
“I’m not on Tinder.” Shep swipes left one more time then locks his phone.
He was definitely on Tinder.
“Didn’t like anyone?”
Levi wouldn’t have placed Shep as a Tinder kind of guy, but to be fair, he doesn’t know Shep that well yet.
“I wasn’t on Tinder, I…” He knows that Levi knows he was on Tinder. And Levi knows he knows Levi knows. “…I just thought it’d be fun, someone said that it was a lot of fun, I’m not sure I really get the appeal, I just feel bad for judging all these people now-“
“You don’t have to feel bad about it. They’re judging you too.”
“Doesn’t that make it worse?” Shep shrugs. “I think I’m better off without it.” He opens his phone again and deletes the app.
“I should take you out for some actual fun. If you’re downloading Tinder for entertainment, you should go somewhere. I guarantee you it’ll be better than Tinder.”
“I-I guess, I’m not really supposed to be having fun, particularly because Bantam could come around at any time-“
“Is she going to arrest you for having fun?”
“She- Well, she won’t, but it’ll look like I’ve been slacking off. Can we disguise it as guardian angel activity, at least?”
“Sure,” says Levi. “Let’s make a plan.”
They make a plan, and then they forget about it.
And then, a week later, Levi remembers the vague plan that they made. He should probably do something about that. Take Shep somewhere local. There’s only one local place he knows well enough to navigate to and from, and it’s the Badland. Which, despite the name, is a pretty nice place, as long as you’re not staying there.
The Badland is a half-club, half-hotel that’s a hotel for three floors and then has a nightclub on the fourth floor. It’s a bit of a design flaw and probably quite unpleasant for anyone staying on the floor directly underneath, but that’s their fault for sleeping in a place called ‘the Badland’. It’s never particularly busy, probably because of the hotel thing, but it’s got a good atmosphere and no one gets drunk enough to start murdering people, so it’s Levi’s bar of choice.
Demons tend to hang out there too, sometimes. They don’t know who Levi is yet, mainly so he doesn’t have to go through the shame of being seen in public looking like this, but he comes here anyway to feel safe. He’s friends with the staff, so it’s probably a good place to take Shep. As long as he doesn’t find out about the demon thing. It’s friendly enough.
The room is dimly lit except for the lights shining on the dance floor. Levi heads to the bar, far away from all that garbage where Someone Might Actually See Him. Shep follows, looking somewhat nervous and extremely out of place in his scarf and brown jacket.
“Do you want me to buy you anything?” He tells himself he has enough money to do this. He probably doesn’t, but it’ll be alright as long as they only want one thing each and nothing else. He wants to do something nice for Shep. He wants Shep to get drunk and have a good time, and Levi can at least fund the start of that.
Shep points to the most expensive item on the list. “What’s that?”
“Oh, it’s terrible. You won’t like it,” says Levi, and points to something slightly less expensive. “But this one is good. I’m going to get one of these.”
Levi has no idea what he’s pointing to. All he knows is that it’s not $20 for a glass and hopefully isn’t going to kill him.
“I’ll have one of those too, then. Thanks, Levi.”
“No problem.” Levi walks over to the bartender. It will be fine, he thinks over and over again, trying to make himself believe it. He will not go bankrupt.
Shep gets his drink, and Levi takes him out to the dance floor. Levi doesn’t know how to dance, he doesn’t think it’s fun in any way, but he wants Shep to have fun. Maybe waste a bit of time. Piss off some angels. But mostly have fun. There’s no point to anything if you’re not prioritizing fun.
It would appear Shep also doesn’t know how to dance. He’s holding the glass, awkwardly sipping it while moving side to side and trying to do something with his arms. Levi doesn’t know what.
To be fair, Levi can’t really judge, because he’s just started doing the Macarena to rap music. Shep notices Levi and tries to copy him.
Levi doesn’t think that Shep has ever done the Macarena before.
“Alright, so, first of all, I think you should put your drink down. Actually, no, you shouldn’t, someone might spike it.” People are trash everywhere. “Finish it first. Then I’ll show you.”
Shep tips the cup back, drinks it in one go, then places it down on the nearest table. He doesn’t even cough or anything. He has…no reaction to the fact that he has just chugged what looks like straight vodka with red food colouring.
“Okay. I’m ready to have fun. How does this work?”
An hour later, Shep is still doing the Macarena. It doesn’t fit in very well with the songs that are playing, but he’s having fun. Levi ditched him after ten minutes to sit down and not dance. That’s how he prefers to live his life in a club.
He’s watching Shep, though. Not because he likes to watch Shep. That’d be creepy. Levi definitely does not like looking at Shep and his face and his arms and beautiful eyes and god damn it. He’s watching Shep because he’s worried. There are demons around. And even though demons aren’t bad, having an angel and a demon meet unexpectedly could end Not Very Well.
But holy shit, Levi’s never seen someone do the Macarena as well as Shep does it. Levi tears his gaze away from Shep for a moment to order another pineapple juice, because he’s a weakling and doesn’t handle alcohol well, and when he turns back around, Shep is gone.
Oh, shit.
He’s been kidnapped.
Of course it was the moment that Levi looked away that Shep got kidnapped. They Know. They’re watching. Levi doesn’t know who They are, but they’ve taken Shep and he’s sure as hell going to-
“I think there’s some kind of demon in here, Levi.” Shep reappears next to Levi.
“Holy shit.” Levi takes a breath in. Well, at least Shep hasn’t been kidnapped. That would have sucked pretty hard. “Demon. Right. Should we leave?”
“No. I just need to stay and watch. Make sure no one gets hurt. Including you.”
“I can protect myself,” says Levi. “Your job is to protect other people. Leave me out of it.” So what if Levi liked pineapple juice instead of alcohol? He could hold his own in a fight against a demon. And by ‘hold his own’ he meant that he could probably use the King Of Hell thing as some kind of leverage. And if that didn’t work he would run. So basically he could win.
“As a friend and not a guardian angel, I don’t want you to get hurt.”
At the utterance of the word ‘angel’, several heads turn toward them.
...oops.
Shep doesn’t notice. “You help me keep watch, then. If you see anything suspicious, tell me.”
They sit around for a while to watch for a demon but nothing happens. There are definitely still demons around, at least half the people here, but Shep hasn’t noticed them yet. He’s been looking for some big tentacle monster thing, and since he hasn’t seen one yet, he’s chilling out a bit.
“Hey, man, maybe there isn’t a demon here anymore. You wanna go back to the dance floor? I can keep watch here if you want. There are some hot girls looking your way. Go have fun, or whatever.”
“I’d rather make sure that there’s no demon than dance with hot girls.” Shep leans back in his chair. “I haven’t seen any more signs of a demon, though. Maybe you’re right. I should go and have fun. Or something along those lines.”
“Exactly. Go dance with hot girls. I’ll watch everyone and make sure there’s no demon.” This isn’t exactly something that Levi can uphold, since there are about six demons he can see in plain sight, it’s just that Shep doesn’t know they’re demons. They don’t look like murder-y demons, though, so it shouldn’t be a problem.
“I…I don’t want to dance with hot girls?”
“You don’t?” Why wouldn’t you want to dance with hot girls? There’s so many of them here and they’re all so friendly if you’re not a total douchebag. Shep would be able to make friends with them pretty quickly and if he wanted to-
“Levi, I should probably tell you.”
Oh no.
“I’ve been meaning to for a while but I never knew when to, I-“ Shep freezes, looks at the ground and sighs. “I just didn’t know how.”
Oh, shit, this isn’t going to be good. Levi has missed something very important and he thinks he’s just worked out what it is.
He’s going to wait for Shep to say it himself.
“I’m…” He doesn’t say anything else for a while. “I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you, I’m trying very hard to work out how to say this right, I’m…”
“Take your time,” says Levi, because he knows this feeling all too well.
“I’m lonely and I’m tired of it and I don’t like girls.”
That makes way too much sense and Levi’s been oblivious to it this whole time.
“I’m gay.”
Of course Shep is gay. No straight man looks that attractive in a scarf. Among everything else that comes with being gay, like his complete disregard for hot girls.
“Me too,” says Levi.
Shep’s worried expression quickly disappears and turns into a laugh. “I know, Levi.” He’s gone from scared to relieved in a matter of seconds and...that makes Levi happy. He’s glad that Shep trusts him enough to have told him.
“Yeah, yeah I just figured I never told you properly. I’m trans, too.”
“I’m perfectly aware of that.” Shep laughs again and Levi feels something he doesn’t want to feel inside his heart.
Go away. He’s not allowed to feel like this.
“Just thought I’d make sure you knew.”
“Thanks.” Shep is smiling again.
He’s pretty. Levi thinks this often. Shep’s hair always looks soft and when he smiles his eyes light up too. Levi doesn’t have a poetic way to describe it, he doesn’t have any metaphors like ‘his eyes were like stars in the midnight sky’ because he’s not a romantic like that. He just thinks Shep looks good. That’s all.
Romance isn’t a part of it anyway, when was romance ever a part of it, there’s nothing romantic in just saying that someone looks pretty. It’s just an observation. A comment. A statement. Romance doesn’t need to be brought into it.
Oh, shit, he’s been staring at Shep this whole time. Again.
“You look tired, Levi.” Shep shakes Levi’s shoulder. “Time to go?”
Tired. Yeah. That’s what he is. He’s just. Tired. He is Just Tired. Nothing more to it. “Time to go,” agrees Levi, and he definitely doesn’t keep thinking about how he is definitely just tired and is definitely not gay for Shep.
They walk out of the building into the cold. Shep pulls his scarf tighter.
“Well, that was a fun night,” says Levi. “Want to come back to my place for a bit?”
“No, I think I’ll head back home.” Shep puts his hands in his pockets. “Tonight was enjoyable, though. Thanks for suggesting it.” He turns to walk away, but hesitates. He opens his mouth to say something then closes it.
Shep walks away slowly.
Levi heads home too, looking over his shoulder every few seconds to see if Shep’s heading the right direction. If Shep is still walking in a straight line.
Levi’s worried about him. Something feels wrong, not anything specific but the air is just...weird. He should have walked home with Shep, just to make sure.
He looks over his shoulder and Shep’s not there any more.
It’s probably fine, he’s probably just- magicked himself back to angel land or something. He’s turned the corner.
He’s obviously been kidnapped.
Levi should go check. Better safe than sorry. He knows he’s always assuming that Shep’s been kidnapped but he just wants to make sure. Levi turns around and heads the direction Shep went.
“Shep?” he calls. There’s no response.
Of course, if Shep’s gone home, there wouldn’t be. So no response is a good thing.
Or it could be a very very bad thing.
...yeah wait never mind it’s a bad thing. Shep is standing, glaring at someone, just outside the light of the street lights.
The someone looks like a person but on second glances they’re definitely a demon. Shep doesn’t know that yet.
“I’m sorry but I have to go now-“
“Not so fast. I need you here.” He grabs Shep’s shirt and pulls him into a headlock.
“Why?” he says, struggling to pull the demon’s arm away, not visibly panicked but maybe a little frustrated.
“The King of Hell likes you.”
“So?” Shep keeps trying to break free.
Now Levi can panic too because not only has a Bad Demon™ got Shep but they also know who Levi is.
“Ransom,” says the demon.
“I don’t know any King of Hell-“ Shep pulls the demon’s arm away. “And I don’t know why he would want anything to do with me.”
“There’s a lot of things you don’t know.”
Shep steps backwards and it’s then he sees Levi out of the corner of his eye and his expression of vague fear turns into one of less vague panic.
Get out, he mouths to Levi.
Levi shakes his head and gestures to the demon. His back is turned. Time to use what limited magic he has.
Keep him distracted, Levi mouths alongside a bunch of hand gestures that mean nothing but hopefully help get the meaning across. It’s times like this Levi wishes he knew sign language.
He creates a flame in his hand and creeps towards the demon.
“And do you work for the King of Hell?”
“Not really. Not a big fan of his.”
And that is when Levi lights the back of the demon’s shirt on fire. It starts at the seam where he doesn’t notice, and quickly crawls up his back, which he does notice.
The demon whips around.
“You,” he says.
“Who?”
“The King, obviously,” the demon hisses as he tries to put out the fire on his shirt.
“…who?” Levi isn’t very good at pretending but it’s distracting at least, and he thinks he’s putting on a good show so it’s working in some way.
“You’re…not the King of Hell?”
“King of-“ Levi sighs and does the cross thing where you touch your head and your shoulders and stuff. He doesn’t actually know how to do it but because he’s a demon and the other guy is also a demon he figures a little creative license won’t hurt. “Good lord, who do you think I am?”
The demon throws back his head and groans. “I- You have to be. You’ve got this energy that-“
“Oh my God, I’m possessed.” This is just getting ridiculous. Levi gestures for Shep to get out but Shep shakes his head vigorously. Levi gestures harder. He needs Shep to leave so he doesn’t have to make up terrible excuses that no one is going to believe. “It’s a curse in my family- we’ve all got this terrible demonic energy that just possesses us, The King of Hell has chosen me, and I’m next-” Levi puts his head in his hands and fake cries. He doesn’t know who would be buying it at this stage. This shit’s gotta end. “I’m going to die,” he sobs.
“Oh. Jeez. Real sorry about that, man,” the demon says, somewhat sheepishly. Levi can’t believe he’s buying it. “I guess I’d better go and find the real King of Hell, then.”
Levi looks through his fingers just in case he’s still there. The demon is gone.
Levi takes his hands away from his face and pulls Shep in for a hug.
“Are you alright?”
“I’m fine. That was…weird.”
“I know, right? Why would…” Levi’s fake laugh is less convincing than his act before. Lying to other people is easy. He never has to see them again. He doesn’t care about them. They don’t matter.
Lying to Shep is hard.
“Yeah, I know,” Shep laughs. “He was strange. I…he was definitely a demon, I could tell. But he didn’t look like one.”
“Sometimes the worst ones look just like normal people.”
That definitely doesn’t apply to Levi. Definitely.
There‘s a knot in his stomach that is growing bigger with every sentence.
“I didn’t know that demons could look like normal people.” Shep looks at the ground. “All my life, I’ve…they’ve told me that demons are all…”
“People lie.” Levi takes Shep’s hand. “It’s not your fault.”
“Levi, I’m scared.” Shep squeezes Levi’s hand and presses his forehead to Levi’s shoulder. “It could be anyone, now.”
Uh oh. Uh oh.
It could be anyone, Levi, it could be me, it could even be you. Or some shit like that. That’s what Shep is going to say. And it’s going to make Levi feel horrible. For betraying Shep. For lying to him. From hiding this from him for so long.
“Anyone we pass could be a demon. Levi, you’re…I trust you. But no one else. You- you haven’t lied to me, you’re not trying to kill me, you’re not trying to shoot me down or get me out of the way. You’re the only one who hasn’t.”
That actually makes Levi feel a million times worse than what he thought Shep would say. Like. Ouch. Shit. Levi is a demon and maybe he’s not trying to kill Shep but he’s definitely lying about it. And he was definitely trying to get rid of him for a while there too. But he doesn’t want to hurt Shep. Or get rid of him any more.
Maybe he should try just not being a demon.
No, that’s stupid, that’s not how it works, that’s not how any of this works and he already knows that trying to not be who you are is pointless. He can’t just stop being a demon no matter how hard he wants to. All he can do is make sure that Shep doesn’t get hurt. That’s the best he can do. He can’t stop being a demon. But he can still promise-
“It’ll be okay. I’ll keep you safe.”
It’s the only thing he’s said tonight that might be true.
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